I'm tired of being disrespected by people I don't even know, and those people don't even know me. How shallow and small minded can you be that you have sink so low as to make fun of people. I hate that, I sit there and I'm a quiet person, I answer when I am called on, and I respect other's space and privacy. I chose to not be loud and obnoxious like other's, and that's ME.
It's just so low of anyone, if you have to give glares, angry stares, when you didn't do anything wrong. And all you probably did was look up and glance around.
I'm numbed of all feeling for awhile now, so it's ok, but there is a point where my patience runs out and my 'horrible' side is no longer on the fritz. Believe it when I say, I have one of the most terrifying pissed of modes, where I could probably actually do damage to someone and their person. No one has seen that side of me, not one of my closest friends, just my brothers, and not really mom. Sure, we've yelled at each other like crazy before where I actually broke down and cried, but other than that. No, no one has never seen my other personality. And truthfully, I would rather keep that part of me locked away so it doesn't hurt others because I KNOW that side of me could hurt anyone it pleased.
I'm procrastinating, I should really practice my speech, but I like the feeling of suspense in having to give a prepared speech, I will be nervous, but I know what I want to say. And I love that idea. I want to make more hand gestures, eye contact, and actually make it so my voice is strong- no wavering involved. I want to be able to smile and not waver because people stare like you're dumber than dumb. I want to educate people on how to get your novel published, and steps you should take to getting there. Ha, I bet NO one in that room will give me the most dumbfounded look.
But it sucks that I failed my speech and I had more time than everyone and they did some very dumb stuff, like fiddled with their sleeves and they had subjects that were only meant to make you laugh, I actually want something that will make others think. I doubt this will do the job, but I can try, right?
- Music:The Melody of a Fallen Tree by Windsor for the Derby